Many A True Word…

 

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, “I can’t accept money from you; I’m doing community service this week.” The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

 

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, “I can’t accept money from you; I’m doing community service this week.” The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

 

Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied,  “I can’t accept money from you; I’m doing community service this week.” The  politician was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up, waiting for their free haircut.


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Small Is Beautiful

An early evening seminar at the Hume Institute led by the Chair of the First Minister’s Council of Economic Advisors is not everyone’s idea of entertainment but Paul Johnson, Director of the Institute of Fiscal Studies made it that for me. Much of his talk and most of the subsequent questions were about the British economy and its performance in relation to the rest of the planet. Given that the IFS out-gloomed the Treasury four years ago when the recession first hit, this was not stuff for the faint-hearted.

But what cheered me were a number of incidental observations. Paul was clear that cutting public spending was counterproductive. But he was also clear that what public spending there was needed to be well directed and that this was almost impossible to co-ordinate at a UK level. This can happen for well intentioned reasons: he cited excessive housing benefit but a paucity of spend on new affordable housing as unbalanced thinking.

Reading between his lines, what was obvious was that, whereas Scotland is forever being lectured on the advantages of being part of the bigger, beefier UK, its smaller scale and self-contained infrastructure make its future a much more manageable problem to solve.

Caught up in this recession, little has been said about how deep Western society was in trouble anyway prior to 2007. We had green targets and made laudable efforts in recycling, etc. But we are kidding ourselves that we were anywhere near a sustainable future and that a return to 2006 would solve everything.

For a start, we build towns and cities based on cars. Car use grows faster than public transport because it’s easier. But with oil back over $100 and petrol at $1.40, just how sustainable is that? The UK government (especially as it’s Tory) is all for development if it could just unleash the cash to do it. The result would be more urban sprawl, such as has covered the green fields of England over the past century. The proportion of spend on any infrastructure will be small and most of that confined to arterial roads.

Already, Scotland has gone down a different path; most of the houses built in the last five years have, thank to Scottish Government incentives, been affordable. These are seldom urban sprawls needing a car to reach but smaller estates near shops or even town centres as Scotland’s stock of brownfield sites is tapped into. Such closer, mixed communities are in themselves more self-sustaining, needing less transport in and out if there are jobs and shopping available within them; they also make less demand on services, whether it be police, health or social work.

Because the major mistake made by the Americans and aped most of all by the English is the omnipotence of the commercial imperative that has resulted in the urban wastelands that are Haarlem, Pittsburgh, South Chicago, Detroit, Watts, etc., etc. We in Britain are not far behind, as evidenced by the detonator of Stoke Newington that ignited a dozen other suburbs and inner cities across England last August. Why didn’t it happen in Glasgow, even though a couple of lads were trying to make it so? Because Scots society, flawed as it is, still has cohesion that has little to do with how much you earn.

So when Cameron announces further measures to curb immigration because 30,000 people were brought into Britain on inter-company transfers when the 20,000 cap on other skilled visas was not even being approached, we have to wonder whose priorities is it that the UK government is following. Scotland’s not full up and has always thrived on those who come here, whether Italians, Poles or English. One thing the Americans DO get right is welcoming those who will work hard, pay lots of taxes and benefit the country. But no-one seems to be asking why locals don’t have the skills these 30,000 people have.

Thankfully, some in Scotland are ‘getting it’. Scottish Power (a.k.a. El Poder Escocece?) is ahead of the game. Chairman Ignacio Galan has announced a £5bn refurbishment of the power grid across southern Scotland, which will required 300 new engineers and technicians. Despite last year’s slump in production in North Sea oil & gas (largely due to new draconian tax regimes from the UK Treasury) this month BP announced a £2bn investment programme mainly to exploit resources in the Celtic Sea west of Shetland.

Not being as sensitive to immigration as our Southern cousins, we Scots will again welcome whoever shows up to fill those jobs—and the pile of others still to be created as the renewables industry keeps growing to provide Scotland with a modern industrial base. And, as a small country, there is a fair chance that our universities will pick up on such potential and steer their courses towards turning out graduates in tune with the demands that will be made on them in the world of work.

Which, in turn, means that fewer of our skilled young people will feel the need to seek a more prosperous future elsewhere and again reinforce the social cohesion that helps and is helped by what is loosely described as ‘Scottish culture’. There are parallels here with Norway and Denmark. Yes, there are economic parallels and the numbers can be used to make all sorts of arguments. But what matters to people is their quality of life, their sense of being at home among friends and family, of belonging.

Small countries seem to be especially good at that, the more so when—like the Canadians with the Americans of the Danes with the Germans—they have some overbearing self-important bigger neighbour to the south of them. Ask a Canadian or a Dane what they think of their southern neighbour and you usually get the kind of answer that a parent gives about their unruly adolescent—wry with humour, obviously affectionate but glad now to be self-aware enough themselves to have found a more mature, civilised and sustainable form of living.

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Capital Offence

© LochMoy Ltd 2012

Posted in Politics | 1 Comment

Flight to Blarney Cancelled

This week’s announcement by Ryanair of cuts at Edinburgh airport has been touted by the airline as a major blow to the growing airport and claims that passenger numbers are likely to decline from the present 1.8m to 1.5m passengers annually (out of a total for the airport of 8.6m in 2010). BAA, which still owns and operates Edinburgh replied that they “don’t know where Ryanair gets their figures from.”

In fact, looking closely, Ryanair’s plans consist of operating six, rather than seven planes from the hub. The net effect would be to end the service to Berlin and cancel plans for flights to Malmo, Murcia and Talinn. Sounds serious, until you realise that they will still fly to 35 destinations from Edinburgh, including four in Germany.

In fact, there are over 130 places you can fly to direct from Edinburgh, from Sumburgh to Newquay in the UK , from Alicante to Zurich or Tampere to Tenerife. While passenger figures for Edinburgh have dropped by around 5% from their 2007 peak of 9m, most of that drop has been in holiday flights to the sun as people have budgeted tighter for their holidays and some have opted for ‘staycations’ that don’t involve flying.

The drop has been steeper in aircraft movements down 15% from its peak (129,000 to 109,000). But this implies more efficient loading of aircraft (= full seats), which is obviously more profitable for airlines.

On the other hand, business traffic has been steady, helped by the constant addition of new destinations. Key among factors in Scotland competing in the world is the ease with which our business can access markets elsewhere and with which foreign business and tourists can access Scotland. Edinburgh has been the premier airport in Scotland when it comes to doing that so the variety of links is crucial. This is highlighted in ranking the passengers heading for various destinations.

Most Popular Destinations from Edinburgh Airport (source: Wikipedia)

Favourite recreation destinations like the classic Dublin stag/hen night trip are down appreciably but business destinations like London City or Newark NJ show growth. As evidenced here, flights outside the UK account for around 45% of all passengers. This means we are well linked to the rest of the world but the massive numbers for Heathrow almost certainly hide significant numbers in transit to elsewhere in the world.

Although BAA announced last October that they intended selling Edinburgh Airport, this was due to the Competition Commission requiring them to divest themselves of either Glasgow or Edinburgh. Projections for traffic are healthy, with an estimated 25m passengers expected to pass through Edinburgh in 2030.

So Ryanair’s outburst of temper and withdrawal of flights appears to be, at best, a ploy in negotiations for gate charges at the airport. At worst, it is another outburst from their colourful Chief Executive, who is always up for a little publicity, Michael O’Leary. Ever since he hit the headlines handling baggage at Dublin in 1995 he is rarely out of the news. I think his Ryanair service direct to Blarney is the one that should be cancelled.

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Subsea Robbery

One fact that is almost wholly unappreciated outside of the oil business is the obligingly shallow nature of places like the Gulf of Mexico and the North Sea. To landlubbers, the sea looks pretty much the same anywhere and, since it gets dark and eerie much below 40m depth, what does it matter? In some cases, the shallowness can have useful effects, such as enabling causeways to be built between islands in places like Orkney and Eilean nan Siar, but mostly, it’s just sea, isn’t it?

Students of paleogeography have unearthed (unsead?) some interesting history in that the North Sea was once much smaller and some 10,000 years ago, it was possible to walk from Yorkshire to Jutland, provided you splashed across the combined Humber and Rhine at some point. En route you would have passed a chain of highlands that are now being called the Dogger Hills.

Location of the Dogger Hills

As ice age snows melted, sea levels rose and the lower-lying parts flooded. Evidence that the area was inhabited are dredged up by fishermen on a daily basis. The last to submerge were the high Dogger Hills, which now lie submerged 18m-60m below the surface. The Geology of the Dogger Bank notes “a buried relief at an average level of 3 m below the sea floor was discovered. Most likely this relief represents a former glacial landscape covered with soft sediments.” So a drowned world exists out in the North Sea.

Curious as this is, you may be wondering what all this has to do with the price of cheese. Let’s imagine that the UK Govt felt threatened by Scottish independence. How could they secure a better share of the North Sea oil billions that would otherwise fall to Scotland? Well they already did that once in 2000 when the Blair government shifted the agreed maritime boundary where Scots jurisdiction ran to put 6,000 sq. km into England. If you head due East from the Forth, you actually run into England.

An evil-minded Westminster might consider a little land reclamation. With the sea bed barely a building height below the water, it is not inconceivable that an island of several sq km could be reclaimed by a ring of rock ‘seerapp’ armouring, within which sundry landfill materials could be dumped to create dry land. Its official purpose, being 100 miles closer, would be to provide close support for North Sea installations and act as a base for the many offshore wind farms being contemplated for the area. With supply bases, helicopter and rescue facilities and even a tanker and pipe terminal, it could be a business in itself.

But its covert purpose would be less obvious. At that latitude, it should be under English jurisdiction, which makes it part of England. In turn, that would cause a redrawing of the equidistant boundary that caused so much fuss when first drawn in 1999. Because it would actually steal considerably more North Sea bed than the original grab. In fact, it would place England as the dominant benefactor from North Sea oil and gas, even if Scotland would still dominate the Norwegian and Celtic Sea.

The "Dogger Effect" What if the English Reclaimed Dogger Bank?

If all this sounds implausible, then consider what similar investment has done to turn three rocky islands called Macau into one of the fastest growing (literally) places in the world as it passes 28 sq km in size by filling in large sections of the Pearl River estuary.

Posted in Commerce | 4 Comments

Along the Highland Line

Scotland’s Chambers of Commerce have gone public with their criticisms of the rail network North of Perth which they describe as “not fit for purpose”. Given that the last major investment made there was the Inverness & Aviemore Direct Railway over Culloden moor (completed 1898), they may have a point. The timing is no coincidence as the Scottish Government’s Rail 2014 Public Consultation completes this month.

ScotRail Network as at February 2012 (Colours indicate routes run)

Those who travel by rail North of the Central Belt will know what SCC is on about. Though ScotRail use (mostly) Class 170 Turbostar 3-car trains to Aberdeen and Inverness, they are crowded and uncomfortable for a 3+ hour journey and services beyond are slow 2-car Class 154s. The North lines from Inverness to Perth, Kyle, Aberdeen and Thurso are each about 100 miles long or 2 hours’ driving. The respective trains take 2 hrs, 2.5 hrs, 2.5 hrs and 3.5 hrs. Hardly competitive.

Given the difficult landscape and absence of any investment, not much could be done on these four lines without significant investment in infrastructure. The remaining Glasgow-Edinburgh-Aberdeen triangle is another matter. While the Edinburgh-Glasgow Improvement Programme (EGIP) is welcomed, as well as long overdue, it will only provide catenary electric power on the main Glasgow-Edinburgh link and as far North as Dunblane. This will do little to address the SCC’s complaint, nor, in my opinion, start to exploit longer-distance travel within Scotland. At the moment, travelers to Aberdeen are in rather poky 3-car Class 170 Turbostars—adequate for short-haul but not the 150-odd miles to Aberdeen on which they are eternally overcrowded and poor in facilities. They can barely seat 140 standard, plus a dozen First Class passengers.

While I support projects like the recently completed Alloa line and think both Borders and St Andrew are long overdue to be reconnected to the network, what is missing is some ‘big’ thinking to ratchet rail travel in Scotland up closer to continental standards. That would take new thinking by both ScotRail and the Minister and involve new trains and some track improvement.

A ‘feature’ (I’m being kind here) of the Tory rail privatisation was to split track, rolling stock and operators from one another: Network Rail does the track Rolling Stock Operating Companies lease the trains and (in Scotland) ScotRail runs them. The length of leases entered into between ROSCOs and TOCs are generally equivalent to the length of the franchise agreements for the provision of rail passenger services.

At the end of the current ScotRail franchise all leases for trains operating in Scotland will terminate, except for the new Class 380s where we have given a commitment for longer leases as it was more commercially advantageous to do so. Electric rolling stock has lower lease costs than equivalent diesel units, and they are also more reliable and cheaper to maintain and run. Long-term, the Aberdeen triangle must be electrified but what would revolutionise it in the meantime (and justify such investment) is new trains.

Currently there is no such thing as an Aberdeen express but there should be. Currently it takes three hours because each train stops at every lamp post. If you want to be in Glasgow/Edinburgh for a 9 am meeting, you must catch the 05:33/05:56—and even then it’s tight. This is short-haul, Central Belt thinking. It provides 15 trains a day to each of Glasgow and Edinburgh. EGIP will release many Class 170s for use elsewhere, so these could lengthen the trains—but not improve them. What we need is a fresh thinking.

What we need is an express service between Aberdeen and Glasgow, stopping only at Dundee, Perth and Stirling. Using tilting Class 222 Super Voyager (like Cross-Country use), journey times could be cut to barely 2 hours. A fleet of 12 5-car units could provide an hourly service, each with 250 standard and 100 1st class seats. Add in another five units to provide non-stop Dundee/Edinburgh and Stirling/Edinburgh express service that connect with the Glasgow service and you have yourself a railway.

Projected Travel Times for a Class 222 Express (in Minutes)

Naturally, the first question must be: can we afford this? Well the Class 170s we have each cost around £750k per annum to lease. Even if they’re full, their revenue per trip can’t be more than £3k. Assume 3 trips each 5 days per week with a couple of weeks in the sheds and each train will gross £2.25m each year. Even half-full, a Class 222 will gross £7m. Given a lease cost for a used 5-car set of around £3m, that still earns more than the Turbostar. And those Turbostars would still have a job—forming a twice-hourly service from intermediate stations (including the Dunblane-Stirling-Edinburgh service) and feeding passengers into the express stops.

But, more importantly, this ratchets the backbone of Scotland’s rail network up into a 21st century class and means (with EGIP) four of Scotland’s cities and two of its main towns have superb interconnections. ScotRail has gone from 58m to 78m passengers each year but this is the way to keep it climbing. Somewhere in the £738m we are paying to have rail services (plus the £800k we pay in fares) there must be the latitude for the £40m investment that will pay for itself after the first year.

This step would focus future investment on signalling and doubling of the single-track line still in use South of Montrose. It would also trigger us getting serious about rail investment in the more expensive Inverness connection so that all our cities enjoy a decent level of communication. But best of all, car travel would drop, rail travel multiply and business would embrace catering, WiFi and opportunity to work in first class conditions.

Posted in Transport | 2 Comments

J’Accuse

Regular readers know my politics but what may not be so obvious is that I am a fan of the Labour party—not today’s Labour party but the one that John Maclean founded, that spread through the streets and slums where underpaid workers supported the imperial state of 100 years ago.

My admiration stretches easily on to Atlee and Bevan and their visions. But, since my first political memory is of John P Macintosh giving Tory toff Anstruther-Grey a local fright in 1966, the former has recently been a rarity—a Labour politician of vision and humanity who reached out across party boundaries, espousing a rooted inclusiveness that originally lay at Labour’s heart.

How the likes of Derry Irvine and Peter Mandelson ever got into the party remains a mystery to me but what is more relevant is a) the total absence of a politician of real stature in the Scottish Labour of today and b) an embalmed echo of the in-with-the-bricks community strength of the original party. This, more than anything, explains its recent demise. But there is a third, overarching factor, which is that the UK party has lost its soul. Blair may have started that process but others continue it.

Much though I may oppose Labour these days, I still accept the need in Scotland for a party along the lines that Maclean would recognise and embrace. But, since there seems to be little hope of that happening locally, I am encouraged that several blogs and writers dare to put their heads above the parapet in discussion on such things. Local Labour man Neil Foy was on LabourHame decrying cyberbullying from all sides. And today was one of the most insightful and honest letters diagnosing what is at the heart of Labour’s problem and published, with no small amount of courage on both sides, on LabourList.

LOSING FAITH

FEBRUARY 17, 2012

Dear Ed,

I do wonder how often you receive letters from party members and whether they all start by saying how long they have been party members. In my case it is 21 years. As a 15-year-old I was going to be part of a tidal wave sweeping Neil Kinnock to power. I was optimistic in those days.

Since then I have been a parliamentary candidate twice, a school governor and a councillor – generally what you would call an activist. I grew up in the party; my parents were councillors, my mother was a parliamentary candidate three times, my grandfather was a party agent and my great grandfather was the chair of Poplar Labour Party. I’m saying that this party is in my DNA.

All of this makes my current concerns very hard to resolve; mainly that I no longer have any faith that the Labour Party will make a better society – or even wants to do so. This is a feeling that I have been trying to ignore for some time, but I think it is time to raise it with you.

Firstly, the party’s attitude to democracy is pitiful. Internally, it’s a joke and the people and factions competing for power seem to despise party members. I had hoped your review led by Peter Hain would tackle this problem but what came out of that was not a meaningful change from the current state.

It might be forgivable if this rejection of democracy were just an internal thing, but the party’s approach to democracy for the public is just as qualified. After the expenses scandal, Gordon Brown let a lot of basically dirty MPs off the hook and then offered the weakest possible reform to parliamentary accountability (AV) as a sop to the electoral reform movement.

After the election, all it would have taken to have shown some vision and understanding would be for one of the putative leaders to say how ridiculous AV is and have proposed an amendment to the Bill to allow for a third option of STV. But no candidate was willing to upset one third of the electoral college – the MPs – by suggesting there was anything wrong in principle with safe seats.

Your election as Leader also upset me because the party was so desperate to elect someone who would recant the sins of New Labour that they refused to consider whether you actually meant it or whether you would be any good at the job of leading. It shocked me that anyone believed your proclaimed principles when at no time in your career had you espoused them before standing for the leadership. It shocked me that party members, unions and MPs would back you regardless of the fact that you were so clearly not up to the job, have no vision for Britain and can’t communicate very well. That said, I hoped I would be proved wrong once you had won.

Your leadership has shown me how lacking in vision you and Ed Balls are in particular but your team is in general. You talk nonsense about good companies and bad companies as though companies can have ethics. It’s not about companies, it’s the people who make decisions who are, or are not, ethically driven. And your confusing position on austerity is simply small minded.

Austerity may be a necessity but our party, with our values, ought to be standing up for people. And if that means “embracing” austerity, that should be conditional on an outright mission to attack the cost of living for the people who will have to pay for austerity. You know that the major cost of living is housing and that’s driven by a perverse, ever-inflating housing market. But you won’t push for real, meaningful policies that would reduce this overweight cost because any such policy would take the heat out of the housing market and lead to house price deflation. You won’t countenance policies to help the many if the few who will pay are Daily Mail reading swing voters in marginal seats.

This is the core of your problem. Because you believe in power over principle, you can’t tell the difference between vision and triangulation. You think you can keep the left just enough on side through pointless attacks on individual bankers’ bonuses or honours and that you can win the centre ground by attacking the unions and embracing austerity. This ridiculous lack of vision means that I have to wait to see what your latest quote is to know whether – this week – the party’s left wing or right.

While I don’t believe you are any more left wing than Blair or Brown, I don’t particularly care if you’re left or right wing. Leaders have to take a direction and it’s reasonable to ask party members to support the vision – the destination – even if the course isn’t the one those members would prefer.

My problem is that you are not a leader. You are not articulating a vision or a destination, you’re not clearly identifying a course and no-one’s following you. You’re simply coming out with unintelligible guff in response to the latest headlines and seemingly hoping that we’ll think its impenetrability is down to our lack of understanding rather than your lack of coherence. The nonsense you say isn’t even well crafted and your “something for something” speech at conference was simply embarrassing.

I have come to fear that you might actually win the next general election. Your absolute lack of a vision for Britain or any leadership qualities, and in particular your willingness to dissemble about your beliefs to win the Labour leadership makes me fear what you would do if you had any actual power. I don’t believe you know what you would do with power and I fear what you would do to keep it. It’s a formula that would lead to a government with a similar inertia to that of Gordon Brown. Except that you don’t have Gordon Brown’s talents.

People try to tell me that it would be a problem replacing you, but if we excluded the outright mad or bad MPs there’s at least a hundred Labour MPs who couldn’t do a worse job than you.

It is all about talent. I’d love us to have a leader with the articulacy of Emily Thornberry, the intelligence of Stella Creasy, the easy charm of John Woodcock or the tangible decency of Hilary Benn. But somehow the Labour Party seems to drain the talent from its people.

Our shared history and values imply that we will stand for the people who need us most. Right now that’s more than half of the population of this country. But it’s disproportionately people who don’t vote and it’s not swing voters in marginal seats. So we don’t stand for them. Nearly any Labour MP you speak to wants to stand for them but collectively we are incapable of doing so.

The Labour party stands for its leader and his interests first. Then it stands for its MPs and securing their jobs as best as possible. It stands for the union general secretaries (but not their members) just enough to keep them affiliated. After that it stands for swing voters in marginal seats and the media proprietors who can influence them. After that, if we’re lucky, we get to do something for the people for whom the party was created.

And it’s not that we’re any worse than the other parties, who operate just the same. We’re just supposed to be better than them and so our failure is more disappointing. Whether you think we’re a democratic socialist party or a social democrat party, you’re wrong. We’re an illiberal elitist capitalist party with no taste for democracy and a misplaced belief that the masses are better off in our care than that of other parties.

I’m not sure whether your departure would really make a difference to this. Would the next leadership election deliver us a leader or just another functionary fearful of his or her vulnerability and incapable of inspiring?

For all his faults, Blair had a real vision of a Britain that was better and fairer than the nation he inherited. And he had the leadership skills to keep the party together even when we didn’t like the details.

So what am I asking you to do? To prove me wrong maybe? To resign? To be honest I don’t particularly care anymore. I’d like it if you were honest and told us who the Labour Party’s going to help, and how, and set your policy direction consistently with that declaration. And then if we didn’t agree with you, we could just leave rather than persisting with vain optimism.

Alex Hilton

Posted in Politics | 2 Comments

Ye’ll Ken It’s Summer When the Rain’s No’ Sae Cauld

With snowdrops out and the first crocuses showing colour, we may not yet be in Spring but the assiduous visitors are already planning their holidays. So, rather than banging on about politics (again), I thought we might provide a little guidance when it comes to that key variable in vacations: weather.

Given that we are talking about weather in Scotland, we are (despite ‘Sunny Dunny’s protests about being the driest place in Scotland) talking about rain. And, like the eskimos have fifty words for snow, so the nuances that the Scots can make regarding precipitation takes some translating.

Punch once ran one of its many hilarious cartoon digs at the Scots in which a tourist passes a grizzled gamekeeper in the middle of a downpour who, when greeted with “nasty weather” replied “aye, ah doot it’s threatenin’ tae dry up”. Here follows a rough guide for furriner and sassanach alike so that they may better understand local meteorology:

“braw” = a bright day that threatens no rain
“dootful” = although fair now, no clarity whether it might rain later or not
“lowerin” = no rain but low clouds make the day seem dull
“nae drouth” = no rain but with high humidity
“nae washin the day’ = no rain but rain expected
“threatenin'” = no rain but dark clouds imply rain soon
“lyin’ fir mair” = wet ground from recent rain with more expected soon
“haar” = a mist you get wet in as you walk through it (actually a cloud at ground level)
“scotch mist” = a haar so dense you don’t have to move to get wet
“showery” = if it’s not raining, it soon will be and vice versa
“drouthy” = intermittent rain (like showery but with more rain than none)
“cloudburst” = sudden, intense rain shower that seldom lasts more than a few minutes
“thunderplump” = worse than a cloudburst and normally accompanied by thunder and lightning
“dreich” = steady but not particularly heavy rain with low clouds and little sign of relief
“squally” = a dreich day but with wind to blow the rain around
“pelters” = rain and wind together that make umbrellas unmanageable
“stoatin’ doon” = a dreich day but with large drops of rain
“drookit” = a dreich day but with dense drops of rain
“stair rods” = intense and persistent rain with large and/or dense drops of rain
“richt sou-wester” = intense and persistent rain with gusting winds from varying directions
“whitecaps”  = intense and persistent rain with winds strong enough to whip drops from puddles
Posted in Environment | 2 Comments

SAC Race

Always good to see the Scottish press lead off debate on things that matter to us all. Today, The Record features the deliberations of Westminster’s Scottish Affairs Committee who have put their heads together and come up with an inquiry that is based on a list of…well, let’s see…it seems to be a list of questions most of which The Record seems to have forwarded from its readership.

The Scottish Affairs Committee, representing such hot-beds of debate on matters Scottish as Congleton, Dewsbury, Finchley and Warrington, has decided to seize the initiative and clarify all this confusion over what independence means. By posing the questions raised the committee apparently feels it is driving the agenda and racing to a conclusion by “asking and answering these questions about how it will affect every aspect of every life”. No modest ambition here.

Committee chairman Ian Davidson said: “We are extremely grateful for all the responses from Daily Record readers, who told us the sort of things they needed to know.” Then, demonstrating his unique take on impartiality, Mr Davidson went on to say: “The big question is the terms of the ‘divorce settlement’—how resources, rights and responsibilities would be broken up.”

Anyone truly committed to calming fears and spreading the truth would do well to consider less loaded and inflammatory language. But his woeful contributions mirror any in his party. From Shadow Scottish Secretary Curran, on through Lords Foulkes and Robertson, right down to Lab leader La Lamont, all sing off the same dismal hymn sheet. The rather obvious collusion among SAC, Labour and The Record means that giving any of them the benefit of the doubt may seem foolish. Or fruitless. Or both.

But Scotland deserves better—this debate is too important. However much a sham the ‘objective’ cover of a Westminster select committee may be, it must be faced and dealt with or we’ll start off with a free Scotland tainted by the same self-serving bigotries. Just about any Scot who has been paying attention—to the better media and not just the SNP—could answer SAC’s daft questions in their sleep. But to anyone having trouble, there are thousands out here happy to help.

Posted in Politics | 1 Comment

Carte d’Amitié

L’UNION LIBRE

Ma femme à la chevelure de feu de bois
Aux pensées d’éclairs de chaleur
À la taille de sablier
Ma femme à la taille de loutre entre les dents du tigre
Ma femme à la bouche de cocarde et de bouquet d’étoiles
de dernière grandeur
Aux dents d’empreintes de souris blanche sur la terre blanche
À la langue d’ambre et de verre frottés
Ma femme à la langue d’hostie poignardée
À la langue de poupée qui ouvre et ferme les yeux
A la langue de pierre incroyable
Ma femme aux cils de bâtons d’écriture d’enfant
Aux sourcils de bord de nid d’hirondelle
Ma femme aux tempes d’ardoise de toit de serre
Et de buée aux vitres
Ma femme aux épaules de champagne
Et de fontaine à têtes de dauphins sous la glace
Ma femme aux poignets d’allumettes
Ma femme aux doigts de hasard et d’as de cœur
Aux doigts de foin coupé
Ma femme aux aisselles de martre et de fênes
De nuit de la Saint-Jean
De troène et de nid de scalares
Aux bras d’écume de mer et d’écluse
Et de mélange du blé et du moulin
Ma femme aux jambes de fusée
Aux mouvements d’horlogerie et de désespoir
Ma femme aux mollets de moelle de sureau
Ma femme aux pieds d’initiales
Aux pieds de trousseaux de clés aux pieds de calfats qui boivent
Ma femme au cou d’orge imperlé
Ma femme à la gorge de Val d’or
De rendez-vous dans le lit même du torrent
Aux seins de nuit
Ma femme aux seins de taupinière marine
Ma femme aux seins de creuset du rubis
Aux seins de spectre de la rose sous la rosée
Ma femme au ventre de dépliement d’éventail des jours
Au ventre de griffe géante
Ma femme au dos d’oiseau qui fuit vertical
Au dos de vif-argent
Au dos de lumière
À la nuque de pierre roulée et de craie mouillée
Et de chute d’un verre dans lequel on vient de boire
Ma femme aux hanches de nacelle
Aux hanches de lustre et de pennes de flèche
Et de tiges de plumes de paon blanc
De balance insensible
Ma femme aux fesses de grès et d’amiante
Ma femme aux fesses de dos de cygne
Ma femme aux fesses de printemps
Au sexe de glaïeul
Ma femme au sexe de placer et d’ornithorynque
Ma femme au sexe d’algue et de bonbons anciens
Ma femme au sexe de miroir
Ma femme aux yeux pleins de larmes
Aux yeux de panoplie violette et d’aiguille aimantée
Ma femme aux yeux de savane
Ma femme aux yeux d’eau pour boire en prison
Ma femme aux yeux de bois toujours sous la hache
Aux yeux de niveau d’eau de niveau d’air de terre et de f’eu.

André Breton

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